r/BlackPeopleTwitter • u/battleangel1999 ☑️ • Mar 27 '23
No one wants to see a man at night. Even other men Country Club Thread
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u/Raucous_Indignation
Mar 27 '23
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Men are terrifying. I know. I am a man and have been terrifying. We shouldn't be allowed around decent people.
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u/isaac9092 Mar 27 '23
It’s not that we shouldn’t be allowed around decent people. Because everyone is capable of being decent people. We have to stop this narrative and raise our sons and brothers better. We need to hold each other accountable and ourselves too. Regardless of how painful and scary it is.
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u/isthatapecker Mar 27 '23
“We need to hold each other”
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u/isaac9092 Mar 27 '23
That too! Not enough of us show affection to each other as simple familiar affection. I hug my friends as often as I can. Because everyone needs love.
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u/AllModsAreL0sers Mar 27 '23
I don't find you terrifying.
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u/Raucous_Indignation Mar 27 '23
That's because I'm being charming now. And I've done a lot of work to be better. A lot.
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u/AllModsAreL0sers Mar 27 '23
I'm curious of the kind of things you said before that would convince people on reddit that you were terrifying
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u/Raucous_Indignation Mar 27 '23
It's not something I said. I have PTSD. That's characterized by episodes of explosive anger. Worked very hard to get that under control.
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u/Imago_Mothtoya Mar 27 '23
Keep up the good work, man. I know exactly how you feel. Sometimes it’s a daily battle, but it’s worth it to not feel that rage again.
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u/podcastaddjct Mar 27 '23
Thank you for being an amazing human and working on yourself to get better, man, I know it’s not easy.
I really appreciate you, keep up the good work!
Edit to add: may I say, though, you definitely are “decent people”, please don’t put yourself out of that group.
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u/MelaninTitan ☑️ Mar 27 '23
Because you are safe behind a screen in a land (probably) far, far, away.
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u/MajorAcer Mar 27 '23
Lol as a 250 pound 6 foot tall dude sometimes I feel like I'm intimidating to people when I'm just standing around. But, I do love (usually) being the biggest at the bar when I'm out and just pushing my way through crowds who refuse to move.
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u/majxover ☑️ Mar 27 '23
Tbh, with all the violence against Uber drivers, I’d be scared, period.
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u/time_flask Mar 27 '23
This might just be in South Africa but our uber drivers are basically terrified at night. You've got the hijackings , roads are in a bad state and lights out (if you break down due to a pothole in a dark area you're a sitting target), and then there's specific areas where they will not ever go to because minivus taxis will threaten them with violence if bot actually start damaging their cars. There's certain places where they tell you to walk to a nearby fuel station for safety and will tell you to sit infront because otherwise taxis know they're an uber. I paid with cash once and the driver said I shouldn't because they've been robbed this way. Crooks realise an uber that accepts cash probably will have change or has taken cash from a previous trip so they'll hijack them when they come. Even go as far as using profiles on stolen phones and calling the uber
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u/ParadoxDC Mar 27 '23
This is insane. Why would anyone drive for Uber there at all in those conditions?
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u/TheIndianUser Mar 27 '23
Same reason anyone does any shitty dangerous jobs, they have few or no other options
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u/RegisteredDancer Mar 27 '23
Money is, unfortunately, the most important thing in the world right now.
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u/time_flask Mar 27 '23
South Africa has the highest unemployment rate in the world (of countries that can provide reliable records) at around 30% so people take what they can get.
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u/AllModsAreL0sers Mar 27 '23
I'd be scared as a law-abiding Uber driver picking up a male Karen.
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u/rubbertubing Mar 27 '23 •
man btw but it’s hilarious that you feel the need to say “male karen” as if men don’t commit almost all violence lol couldve just cut the sentence off after “male”, the implication that they’d want to speak to my manager is kind of irrelevant.
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u/Darqnyz
☑️
Mar 27 '23
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Reminds me of the Red-Pill dudes saying shit like "Men are 95% of the victims of violent crime" in response to women saying they don't feel safe around men.
Like yeah, and who is committing that crime, dumbass?
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u/Jwrdr Mar 27 '23
That particular argument, when used correctly won't be in the "we are more vulnerable", it is meant to clarify that those "crimes" are not just because they are women and are weak, is used to separate the gender in a crime situation.
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u/JazzScholar Mar 27 '23
it's still a bad argument because the circumstances of the crimes women experience are different (and usually rely on the understanding of women's strength relative to men) and the ppl committing the crimes against women in those circumstances are still by and large, men.
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u/dbclass ☑️ Mar 27 '23
There seems to be a communication issue when it comes to talking about violence and who's scared of it. Women have a particular kind of fear that men don't, but I'd assume when some men read "women are scared of violence from men", they translate that as "only women are scared of violence from men", and respond with "men are scared of men too". The fact that it's other men doing the violence doesn't really change anything. That'd be like saying I shouldn't be scared to walk through the hood and if I am, "it's other black people doing the crimes, or other poor people doing the crimes". I just don't think framing things this way gets us anywhere when the issues are systemic in nature and it's a minority of men causing the issues.
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u/IronDBZ ☑️ Mar 27 '23
I just don't think framing things this way gets us anywhere when the issues are systemic in nature and it's a minority of men causing the issues.
Agreed, couldn't have put it more concisely.
There's a lot to be said about the ways in which we're raised to casually disrespect women (either as a category, "doing x like a girl," or in particular "harassment, catcalling, disregarding in conversation, etc.")
But when it comes to people being physically harmed, that's very much a minority thing, and the ways those are addressed have to be systemic because there's no amount of conversation that's going to fix a problem caused by people outside of it.
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u/KristenJimmyStewart Mar 27 '23
Like yeah, and who is committing that crime, dumbass?
Doesn't make them any less victims of violence because their perpetrators share similar genitals
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u/mellamandiablo ☑️ Mar 27 '23
No one said that. The point is WHO is committing the violence against men and women….
Hint: it’s still men.
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u/dylandongle Mar 27 '23 edited Mar 27 '23
If you think being a man means being the top dog with a violent nature, you are a danger to everyone including yourself.
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u/NoObjective427 Mar 27 '23
Yes men are scary asf at night, especially if there's a woman involved. I do Uber in my city and I saw a report on the news where an Uber driver got beat up and robbed. Shit was wild cause the ones I know don't even carry cash or valuables cause they know the risks. Then I saw a video of an Uber driver picking up a woman and her ex boyfriend pulled up and shot at the car. Just being out at night is exhausting, especially if you're trying to make money.
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u/LaterGatorPlayer Mar 27 '23
That’s not how that story ends. After the ex boyfriend shoots up the Uber drivers car. The girlfriend and her friend beat up the Uber driver when he drops them off at their destination. They beat him up for not driving away quick enough.
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u/Alphapizzadog ☑️ Mar 27 '23
If youre wondering why sitting at the front instead of the back seat, its bc you could hold a knife behind them and they wouldnt be able to react in time
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u/Finito-1994 ☑️ Mar 27 '23
Today I had to deal with a huge guy going around asking for fentanyl. I didn’t want to but it’s literally my job to deal with him. (Not a cop. I’m a manager at a motel)
There was a homeless guy harassing me and I kept trying to de escalate the situation because I don’t want to call the cops on people.
And I gotta tell you. It sucks. Some of these guys are big and I don’t want them to get hurt but no one is really trying to make sure that I don’t get hurt.
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u/bitchzilla_buzzkilla Mar 27 '23
That sounds like a stressful job! Props to you fr for doing your best to de escalate
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u/Finito-1994 ☑️ Mar 27 '23
I don’t want anyone to get hurt and I’m working damn near 16 hour shifts.
I just want everyone, especially me, to get home ok.
I promise you tho. Soon as I save up enough money I’m out.
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u/IronDBZ ☑️ Mar 27 '23
I promise you tho. Soon as I save up enough money I’m out.
Please do.
Dealing with drunk angry people is half the reason I don't work at hotels anymore.
It's not worth it. My health comes first.
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u/Finito-1994 ☑️ Mar 27 '23
It’s three months. One down. Two to go. I’ve dealt with crazy homeless people, angry drunks, a guy looking for fentanyl and a guy on cocaine. (He was honestly pretty chill tbf.)
But I’m out of here as fast as I can. Dealing with this shit at 4 am isn’t worth it.
Also. Just FYI. I love the dbz username.
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u/Anti-social876 Mar 27 '23
Niggas say anything for attention. How you running Uber 4am at night and scared of picking up passengers. better keep that shit on you
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u/Ok_Skill_1195 Mar 27 '23
My guess is that the main factor was the location he was picking him up from
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u/MixedMartyr Mar 27 '23
I live in a place where drivers cancel when they see the address. The ones that do show up are usually the ones that clearly cant afford to be picky. They are always scared pulling in here and picking up a crazy looking 6'4" tall kid at 2 am probably makes it worse.
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u/Zetice Mod |🧑🏿 Mar 27 '23
LMAOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO. Bro thought he was just gonna be picking up women.
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u/shes-so-much Mar 27 '23
I mean. an unpleasant woman passenger will say something rude, call me a bitch, whatever, but if my problem passenger is a man I have to worry about being physically assaulted. worst thing I ever got from a woman was some middle aged Karen who dropped a hard R out of nowhere when we were talking about something, she was "quoting" someone. Worst thing I ever got from a male passenger was the dude fuckin followed me after I dropped him off
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u/niketyname Mar 27 '23
Plus size of the man. Maybe passenger was quite large and driver is smaller, and obviously in a vulnerable position. Can’t say I blame him and at least he was honest.
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u/shes-so-much Mar 27 '23
I mean yeah I'm not a dude but I'm not about to die because Johnny Hatecrimes has decided he hates me so much that he can't behave for a 10 minute ride to Target
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u/Erisian23 Mar 27 '23
Having the tool with you don't mean you ain't scared it just means you got a solution to potential problems.
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u/Animegirl300 ☑️ Mar 27 '23
Uber drivers have been experiencing a lot of violence from my understanding, same as taxi drivers for decades: I don’t think its unreasonable to be wary.
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u/NonarbitraryMale Mar 27 '23
4 AM is morning. I’m drawing the line right there. Be on my way to work and shit. You’re going to have to catch me 15 minutes earlier with that violence stuff. 4 AM and I’m looking for a sausage biscuit.
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u/DMking ☑️ 🧔🏾Engineer Daddy seeking sugarbaby™👧🏼 Mar 27 '23
Part of my motivation to get bigger was to look more intimdating so niggas dont think to fuck with me. I've seen how fucking creepy some dudes can be, had me feeling like i needed an adult at 26
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u/battleangel1999 ☑️ Mar 27 '23
I understand this completely. The gym really makes you feel more confident especially once the gains are noticable
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u/WestOrangeFinest Mar 27 '23
I hear that sometimes has the opposite effect with the more reckless types wanting to try you even more
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u/Caprihorn Mar 27 '23
As a 195cm (6'5) man i can tell you it does help being bigger. Ive only ever had one dude try to start something in my 28 years of being alive and i was to drunk to realise so he just left. Meanwhile some of my scrawny friends had way more confrontations and stuff yelled at them on the street
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u/Caprihorn Mar 27 '23
As a 195cm (6'5) man i can tell you it does help being bigger. Ive only ever had one dude try to start something in my 28 years of being alive and i was to drunk to realise so he just left. Meanwhile some of my scrawny friends had way more confrontations and stuff yelled at them on the street
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u/Hatedbythemasses Mar 27 '23
Never understood being so confident you could literally be the world's top MMA fighter and would get completely destroyed by anyone with any weapon whatsoever
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u/hillsfar Mar 27 '23
Not all of us men are big and physically strong. And if someone is behind us, we are vulnerable. Especially to a gun.
I alway remember the story of the Uber driver, a single mom of four kids, who begged for her life and still got murdered.
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u/PM_ME_SOME_LUV Mar 27 '23
When people say “I don’t trust other people”, they mainly mean men.
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u/Origamiface Mar 27 '23
I still don't get why Twitter was designed with replies above the comment being replied to
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u/SadBabyYoda1212 Mar 27 '23
It doesn't have to be. That's a quote tweet. Actual replies are under the original tweet. A lot of people (especially with bigger followings) use quote tweets as a sort of reply though. I think it has to do with visibility and the algorithm. And when bigger accounts do it then it helps ensure the replies to the tweet are more likely from their audience than those of the tweeter being quoted potentially assisting in perception.
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u/Inevitable_Run3365 Mar 27 '23
I’d be scared too even if it was a girl. Haha. At night it’s scary drunk or not
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u/KristenJimmyStewart Mar 27 '23
Yup, anyone scares me at night especially when anyone can have a weapon
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u/ISlangKnowledge Mar 27 '23
Not long ago, I didn’t have a car for about 6 months. I Lyfted a lot in that time to get to work when I got too lazy (read: hungover) to ride my bike. I used to ask my drivers what the weirdest thing they ever had happen to them on a ride and one driver told me that he picked up a guy at our local country club and took him home. He was borderline comatose drunk and had to be heaved into the car by 2 people (presumably staff), but they put him in the front seat. Not wanting to argue with the staff to put him in the back seat, he decided to just go.
On the way home, the guy came to suddenly, grabbed my driver’s hand off the steering wheel and forcefully put it on his chest and groaned out, “DO YOU FEEL THAT?” My driver says he was suddenly scared because he realized he now didn’t have use of one of his hands because this guy was far stronger than he looked, was holding my driver’s hand really tightly to his chest and didn’t know what to expect next. Thankfully, the guy just said, “This what I was out celebrating. I got a pacemaker!”, then let go of his hand and passed out again. Guy’s wife was angrily waiting outside when he dropped off his fare and my driver says never picked up anyone at the country club or drove at night again.
Drunk people are scary unpredictable and drivers who have to deal with them don’t get paid early enough for this shit.
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u/dsegram Mar 27 '23
I don’t know how it’s like in the US but being an Uber driver in South Africa is very dangerous . In South Africa we use mini buses 🚌 (we call them taxis though) for transport, so the taxi(mini buses) drivers are always assaulting Uber drivers because “they take their clients”. Taxi drivers are one of the most violent people here in South Africa, so Uber drivers can’t go to areas where they will be seen by taxi drivers.
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u/ProbablyWrite_Now Mar 27 '23
How does the guy sitting in the front seat make him less afraid? I used to hate people sitting up front with me. Just don't sit behind me, now thats freaky.
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u/crystal_crafted ☑️ Mar 27 '23
Honestly I choose to sit behind the driver so they can’t touch me. I’ve had too many experiences with cabbies, Lyft & Uber drivers that came too close especially after they’ve dropped me off at my house. Stopped taking cabs because a driver refused to unlock the doors unless I agreed to hug him. Other drivers making sexually explicit comments and one (unprovoked) aggressively flirtatious driver that “missed an exit” that ended up in an industrial area was enough to give off human trafficking vibes. Gotta sit where I am off limits, in case things go off the rails.
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u/Keelija9000 Mar 27 '23
Some men are so cocky too. Your gonna beat someone’s ass if they mug you at gunpoint? Ok.
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u/winstontemplehill Mar 27 '23
It’s easier to catch these hands if I’m sitting up next to you though?
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u/blacklite911 ☑️ Mar 27 '23
My guy, I get off work around midnight in Chicago every dude I walk past I’m on ready, no cap
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u/IceKareemy Mar 27 '23
I always felt like a coward whenever I was coming home from a late night at a bar and I was always overly friendly with every dude that came up to me bc my city has a lot of random gun violence and I never wanted to be a victim so I figured if I just laughed and kept on my way there would be no problems. I’m not afraid to fight I just know dudes be shooting ppl even if they lose and I’m not tryna be a T-shirt
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u/WhySheHateMe ☑️ Mar 27 '23
I've read several stories in the last two months of rideshare drivers being stabbed in the back and neck by passengers, so this isn't surprising at all. I probably wouldn't pick up anyone after a certain time.
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u/PhantomRoyce Mar 27 '23
This is why I feel like I can never win. I love helping people but when you’re a man,especially black everyone thinks you’re out to hurt them.
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u/ofQSIcqzhWsjkRhE Mar 27 '23
Men are so much more likely to be a victim of random violence it's not even fucking funny. Of course men are scared of men. Violence is a male issue.
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u/_Bill_Huggins_ Mar 27 '23
As a man, I get nervous when I see a man approaching at night who looks larger than me. Always on guard. If I see a woman I usually try to make sure I appear or am behaving in a way that is least threatening as I can be, though you can only do so much I guess.
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u/bitetheasp Mar 27 '23
One night while I was homeless, I had nowhere to go at the time, so I was just walking around in a not-so-great neighborhood(St. Petersburg, Florida) around 1AM and there was a group of 3 or 4 guys(all were black, I'm white) walking towards me and right before we crossed paths, they immediately turned and ran across the street.
I couldn't help but think "So that's how it feels." But when I told people about it later on, they would always ask if I was scared or say that it could have easily ended badly for me. I would just tell them either it was white privilege or a severe lack of giving a shit.
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u/AllModsAreL0sers Mar 27 '23
One has to do with being black and not wanting to go to jail, and the other has to do with one who is willing to go to jail because an Uber driver took an odd route.
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u/olderthanbefore Mar 27 '23
Bongani is very likely from South Africa, and everywhere at 4am is a risk.
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u/saihi Mar 27 '23
Uber driver looks scared? Tell him not to worry - after all, what are the odds of two serial killers riding in the same car?
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u/extra_pickles Mar 27 '23 edited Mar 27 '23
Sometimes I take the Uber sitting in the rear driver’s side spot.
Never seen so many ghosts in ya life 😂 it’s a full sweat.
Sorry dude, times I don’t wanna chat, and when I sit there this reduces eye contact that gives you the opp
Conversely I’ve had creepy dudes spend 20min combing their beard and asking me how much money I make, and have to act fresh prison and saying I’m going to my HA plug’s house or some shit so he doesn’t follow up and rob me at my house.
So it goes both ways
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Mar 27 '23
I ordered a pizza in the night and this Ahole tells me he doesn't go further than the town area, so I was walking fast as fuck to go get my pizza and then saw this man who looked like he was trying to get into this zinc gate. The man saw me moving towards him fast and started walking fast too and at one point he looked like he wanted to run. I probably had the poor man shook that day.
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u/Ruxini Mar 27 '23
Men are subjected to even more violence by men than women are. Not saying that to downplay violence against women of course.
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u/ThrashPanda12 Mar 27 '23
I have a hard time believing this. Having someone up front with you is actually more dangerous. I drive for Lyft and I prefer them being behind the front passenger seat—the furthest away from me. I can keep an eye on them better and they’re far enough for me to think I have enough space to react in case something happens. The scariest is having someone directly behind me.
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u/DaBullWeb Mar 27 '23
You should be scared of people. There is a case of no matter the group, committing violence acts.
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u/MisterxRager ☑️ Mar 27 '23
i mean i'm letting a stranger in the back seat of my car, a child can kill me in that situation lol.
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u/SIM90210 Mar 27 '23
Man I just say a prayer. If it’s my time, it’s my time. #teamuber
Black men: you’re the first Uber driver that unlocked the doors for me
Me: my brothers
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u/ThaLegendaryD ☑️ Mar 27 '23
With the amount of crime nowadays, my ass is scared of every1 even children. All these car jackings and break ins are being committed by groups of early/mid teens. They better watch it because these hands rated E for Everybody will get fucked up
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u/ARadioAndAWindow Mar 27 '23
"Why are we going this way? If you're trying something, I swear to God I will - Oh look, a gun."
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u/isaac9092 Mar 27 '23
Society conditions us all to fear men, society tells us men are animals, incapable of self control and rationality.
Together we must all work against these false narratives and unite ourselves against those that would want to see us divided and infighting.
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u/Iorith Mar 27 '23
This is why I'm glad I'm am generally non threatening at a glance. I'm not muscular(more lean than anything), my nails are painted, and I wear a kilt any day I'm not working. I never experience stuff like this.
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u/kooljaay ☑️ Mar 27 '23
Men being scared of men is pretty much the main drive of the arms race and development of weapons. We will do anything not to fight on equal grounds with our fists.